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Created Mar 24, 2008 10:06PM PST • Edited Mar 26, 2008 05:05PM PST

1. Quality

2. Summary

   Really Great 4.5

   Not as wacky as the previews would have you believe, but In Bruges is definitely worth seeing. In this black comedy hitmen Ray (Colin Farrell) and Ken (Brendan Gleeson) are sent to hide out in Bruges, Belgium by their boss Harry (Ralph Fiennes) after a botched job in London. Ken is happy to sight-see and stay in their room at night to await a call from Harry, but the brooding yet fun loving Ray looks for a good time in the pub, on a movie set where they’re filming midgets, and with a blonde by the name of Chloe (Clémence Poésy). Conflicts ensue usually with a violent, yet funny outcome. That is, until Ken and Ray botch their next job and Harry comes to Bruges after them. Trust me, go on and feast your eyes on the fairyland that is In Bruges.

4. Acting

   Great 4.0

   A very strong cast is what makes this one truely outstanding.

5. Male Stars Really Great 4.5

   I don’t really like Colin Farrell, but this film tempts me to change my mind about him for 101 minutes. I couldn’t help but find him adorable, with plenty of scenes that made me want to cuddle him. At the same time, he eloquently came across as an honest to goodness badass without being too cocky about it. This totally makes up for how much I disliked him in Phonebooth.
   Brendan Gleeson is spot on awesome, as always.
   Ralph Fiennes had a bit of a Guy Ritchie villan side to him… you know, the clean cut, fast talking, swearing up a storm, violent tempered “horrible cunt”. But what keeps him set far apart from a Ritchie villan is his heart. That’s right. He’s playing a cunt with a heart.

6. Female Stars Very Good 3.5

   Cute blonde with a weird mouth… sexy in a European type of way, but she didn’t do much… except make out with Colin Farrell… a lot.

7. Female Costars Really Great 4.5

   Thekla Reuten, gotta love a pregnant woman who won’t run away from a gunfight.

8. Male Costars Really Great 4.5

   Peter Dinklage plays the dwarf actor in this movie, and according to imdb.com, he’s uncredited. This seems unfair given that he does a fantastic job playing coked up racist dwarf.

10. Film

    Great 4.0

11. Direction Great 4.0

12. Play Great 4.0

    Witty and biting.

13. Music Great 4.0

14. Visuals Great 4.0
15. Content

16. Edge

    Risqué 2.4

    There’s mild midget racism and realistic gun violence and bloody aftermath.

17. Sex Innocent 1.1

18. Violence Brutal 3.1

19. Rudeness Profane 3.1

21. Reality

    Natural 1.0

    Yep. I believe it.

22. Circumstantial Natural 1.0

23. Biological Natural 1.0

24. Physical Natural 1.0