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Created Sep 29, 2013 05:05PM PST • Edited Sep 29, 2013 05:23PM PST

1. Quality

2. Summary

   Pretty Awful 0.5

   This is quite possibly the worst movie I’ve ever seen. It tries too hard to be funny, and fails miserably. I was putting up with all the terribleness, but when, during a 50-mph car chase, a cop car all of a sudden flipped through the air, I realized that I hated the movie and was starting to hate Harrison Ford and Josh Hartnett for making it. Even Smokey Robinson’s cameo didn’t save this movie.

   I recommend that you never watch this movie; however, if you’re feeling like maybe you should try it, watch the trailer (in the WikChip). All of the “best” moments are contained in it — literally.

   No additional review is needed.

4. Acting

   Bad 1.0

5. Male Stars Bad 1.0

6. Female Stars Bad 1.0

7. Female Costars Bad 1.0

8. Male Costars Bad 1.0

10. Film

    Pretty Awful 0.5

11. Direction Awful 0.0

12. Play Awful 0.0

13. Music OK 2.5

14. Visuals Bad 1.0
15. Content

16. Edge

    Risqué 2.2

17. Sex Innocent 1.0

18. Violence Fierce 2.5

19. Rudeness Profane 3.0

21. Reality

    Glib 2.0

22. Circumstantial Surreal 3.0

23. Biological Natural 1.0

24. Physical Glib 2.0